Spinning Wheels

Whether in snow, mud, or sand, getting a car stuck is a frustrating and challenging endeavor. The first time it happened to me,  I was new to driving and was behind the wheel in my mother’s big station wagon, which could not handle the deep snow we recently received. When I put my foot down on the accelerator, I heard the engine rev and wheels spin. The car moved slightly, then didn’t move at all. I tried pushing down harder to force myself out, but that didn't work. Then, I took my foot off the pedal and tried to touch it only slightly, but it was an equally unsuccessful strategy. Eventually, I learned tires need traction. Putting something between the tires and snow gives them something on which to grip so the car can move.

It's a lesson I was reminded of recently when discussing the new year with friends. We shared our thoughts about the year coming to an end, and our hopes for the one about the begin. We also spoke of the places where we felt our tires were spinning. For one, it was his relationship with a particular child, but others spoke of careers, companies they worked for (or owned), and their marriages.

As we discussed such situations, I was reminded of my futile attempts to get unstuck in the snow. Like me long ago, some of my friends wanted to gun the engines and force things to change, others wanted to press lightly in hopes a gentle approach would bring about change. When someone quoted Einstein’s wisdom that insanity is doing the same thing expecting a different result, I thought of my tires spinning in the snow. Until I did something different, until I placed something between the tires and snow, they continued to spin. By doing something different, by creating traction, the car moved forward.

At this time of year, it’s particularly easy to see and hear our spinning tires. The temptation to force change by doing what we’ve always done with renewed gusto remains, but so does the option of looking for new ways to handle spinning tires. We can look for means of traction. Who knows, the cars of our lives might respond and move forward which, for so many, is our deepest New Year’s wish.