Out of the Closet

I received the call the day before leaving for a new job in England. It was from my best friend from college who called to tell me he was gay. I was shocked, but, looking back, I shouldn’t have been. Still, on my flight across the ocean, I thought about our friendship, about my friend and what it must have been like to have lived in the closet for all those years, as well as what a relief it must have been to come out. Living in a closet is not unique to people hiding their sexual orientation. Closets come in all shapes and sizes, and the reasons to hide in them are countless. 

Everyone, I believe, has found refuge in such a place at some point in his or her life. I grew up with a room that had a big closet. I used to bring my stuffed animals in there with me, a blanket, and a flashlight. It was cozy and safe. Over time, however, cozy became cramped, safe became lonely. I remember the cool air waiting for me when I opened the door. I’m sure my friend felt that way after he came out of his closet. 

Closets provide refuge. In them, we can hide part or all of us because, for whatever reason, we feel something about us is wrong or needs hiding. Fearing we’re not good enough, we retreat to a place where no one will see, judge or laugh at us. Just writing that makes me sad. 

I marvel at my friend’s courage even after all these years. I give thanks for the way he expanded my heart and empowered me to see in a new way. I believe we’ve all been given the gift of life, and God wants us to live life fully – with all that we are, with all that we have. That’s what an abundant life is all about, and on this, my friend’s birthday, I write to invite you to open the closet doors and breathe the fresh air waiting for us all.

Extra Credit:

1.     What parts of your life do you hide from others? From yourself?

2.     Why do you think those parts need to be hidden?

3.     What would it take to bring them out of the closet, and what would such a full or abundant life look and feel like?